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My name is A.J. and I work in a video store called Movie Scene in… - Where The Mans drones can talk of The Mans proliferation

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Previous Entry Oct. 17th, 2004 @ 05:00 pm Next Entry

My name is A.J. and I work in a video store called Movie Scene in New Hampshire. I really do like my job to be honest. The enjoy the people I work with and the tasks I do arent difficult at all. The only thing that makes me absolutely homicidal is customers.

Have you ever seen 'Clerks'? Think of that times 12. I plan on writing a book sometime in my life about all the stupid/disgusting customers I get. (im not joking about that either)

1. A man had a $.60 late fee. You'd think this is something you can just blow off, but no, he has to yell, swear in front of his little kid and all the other little kids in there, and tell me I'm stupid for half an hour over fucking $.60

2. A woman once did not understand that once you rent movies, YOU HAVE TO RETURN THEM. A line was all the way to the back of the store and I had to take the time to explain to this woman that once you rent movies
you have to return them.

3. Ever realise how akward it is to ring up a guy with down syndrome who is renting gay porn?

4. Ever realise how akward it is to ring up a guy who is with his kids and is renting Finding Nemo, Home On The Range, and Transexual Heartbreakers 2?

5. A woman wanted new boxes for her movies, in order to get these 'new boxes' i have to go in a locked back room that requires a manager key. Finally, after half an hour of her badgering me the manager comes and gives me a key. I go through 5 different packages of boxes, every single box i hand to her she says is 'dirty' and 'this one has a scratch on it'. She storms out saying that she hates the place because she cant get her 'new boxes'

6. A woman returns movies requesting a refund saying that its my fault that the movies i rented to her were 'too scary' for her.

7. 'What would you reccomend for a 10 year olds birthday party?' And after presenting every single fucking movie in both Kids and Family sections and her denying every single movie going 'too violent' or 'this probabably has language' (she denied Agent Cody Banks because she said it was probably too violent) she remembers that she didnt have to rent the movie and leaves without thanking me.

8. A woman comes in and asks us 6 times in one day if we have a movie we don't carry. 'I saw it her yesterday!' I was working here yesterday you old fucking hag, I never saw you come in.

9. Asian couple who speak like 4 words of English come in and want to rent like every single movie in the store when you can only rent 6 at a time. I'm not racist or anything, but its a pain in the ass when you have to explain something like that to extremely stubborn people who practicly just got off the boat.

10. A man asks if his son can use the bathroom. 'I'm sorry but we dont have a bathroom that customers can use'   'yeah you do, you're just not gonna let me use it, i'm never renting here again' shut the fuck up you idiotic asshole, there's a grocery store RIGHT NEXT DOOR that has public bathrooms!

11. "Where are the new releases?" as the huge sign is clearly visible upon entering 'NEW RELEASES'.

12. The same person asks 5 times in one visit when Van Helsing comes out. Shut up you idiot, that movie sucked anyway.

13. "I'd like a refund, I watched this movie and didn't like it"

14. Customer: "Can you recommend some good horror movies?" Of course, the original Dawn Of The Dead, They Live, The Excorsist, The Ring, Candyman Customer: "Nah those sound dumd, ill just take this stupid crappy teen horror movie'

And, the one that reigns over all.

A man comes in, drunk off of his ass, renting 6 pornos all having the word 'Ass' in the title, has $4 in late fees. He pulls a pill, a half blue half white pill out of his pocket and offers it to me if i waive his late fees. At this point I'm scared to death and don't know what to do and I don't even know what the pill is and I don't want to know. He laughs and says drunkenly 'YOU TAKE SHIT TOO SERIOUSLY MAN HHUHUHUH!!'
Why do these people exsist?

After Work Today I Am: thirstythirsty.. FOR CUSTOMERS BRAINS
Tunes For Release: The Blood Brothers
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[User Picture Icon]
Date:October 17th, 2004 03:49 pm (UTC)
"Why do these people exsist?"

To make people with more than 3 braincells realize what a great idea serial spaying/neutering of humans is. ;P
Date:October 17th, 2004 05:26 pm (UTC)
this post made me laugh my ass off. I get alot of dumbasses daily at my store too.

oh man clerks. The parts of your post that were all 'renting porn with their kids there' reminded me of Jersey Girl.

i think i will add you as a friend...yes.
[User Picture Icon]
Date:November 1st, 2004 01:57 pm (UTC)
I use to live in New Hampshire and my mom use to always rent movies from MovieScene...they have great Tuesday deals :-D
[User Picture Icon]
Date:November 29th, 2004 05:05 pm (UTC)
This is amazing.
I hope these people set themselves on fire accidently by trying to microwave poptarts while they're still in the foil.

Or at least look up at the rain with their mouths open until they drown.
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